So I’m sitting on the floor of my bedroom, drinking Red Label Johnny Walker (could do worse), eating a plate of cheese, grapes, cold cuts, olives and peanuts I assembled for myself while listening to Childish Gambino.
I’m dressed in a tight black dress. My make-up is done. I’m wearing red lipstick that screams 1960s hot icon. My girlfriends are already at the lounge. It’s 10h30pm on a Saturday night.
I’m eating peanuts while Childish Gambino recites his poetry.
To be quite honest, I am absolutely content with just being in his company the entire night. Along with my fatty food and drink.
And I can’t help but think about this one particular post I saw on Instagram today. One of many I see on a daily basis. You know exactly what I’m talking about. You’ve seen it. “5 months ago, I didn’t want to post this picture (in full) because I was ashamed and afraid of you seeing my faults. But I have learned that it is so not about THAT, about how you look. You are beautiful no matter what. Our body is perfection. We were made this way and we should embrace it. ETC. So today I am sharing with you these pictures.”
95% of them are from people who have (drastically) changed due to physical exercises. The rest of the pictures they show on their social media are all of them looking fairly flawless. Or, on the contrary, people who are all about being in good physical shape and they show how they look in Instagram pictures vs how they look “99% of the time.”
So let us be real: you’re not telling us to love our bodies as they are, you’re telling us to tell you how gorgeous you looked then because you look SO good NOW. Or you want us to praise you for how real you are for that one picture you show us of your sitting, topless and with your skin rolls. (Because, let’s be honest here, that’s not fat. That’s skin.)
And it has become a trend. It’s become a trend to EMPOWER women and men alike to appreciate their looks and their bodies. (Your body is a temple, after all.)
But empower it ONLY if you look a certain way now.
Let’s be clear about one thing: I am in NO way putting down the accomplishments people have made in their eating habits and physical exercises habits. I’m all about eating healthy and living a healthy lifestyle (despite my current situation). But come on.
On the other hand, people who embody whatever lifestyle they live and/or their current struggles with embodying a better lifestyle often show it in a comedic way.
So much so, that at the end of the day, it all comes down to the person performing for you and you, as the audience. They’re selfish, they want attention. And you’re giving it to them, because you believe that in some way they will motivate you. There’s nothing wrong with that. We are all selfish, and we all want attention. We all want to be loved. (Please, look at me.)
But do let me tell you about motivation. Unless it’s intrinsic (aka from within you), it’s not bound to last. You won’t be happy if you’re doing it for someone else or if you look at someone else (unless that picture motivates you to look like that). It doesn’t matter if someone tells you your body is a temple and you should be happy no matter what and no matter how you look like, unless YOU believe it.
But whatever. What do I know. It’s all about the “community.” Making each other stronger and whatnot.
Definitely not about inflating someone’s ego by giving them meaningless compliments on how great they looked 5 months ago before they started their diet that slimmed them down tremendously – of which you only see through a montage of those 5-6 months when at the end they look great. No one wants to be seen in a bad light after all.
No pictures please.